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Monday, December 14, 2009

Hi All

URGENT REQUEST – Reef needs platelets urgently (A+) and there aren’t any for him. None, zero, zip. Platelets cause your blood to clot. Without them you can bleed to death. If Reef had to knock his little arm against the side of those horrible hospital cots, he could bruise, blood could go to his lungs and he could die. When Dec was terminal we were told he would either bleed to death or die from the infection in his lungs. Without platelets, all the internal organs can bleed. Hospice told us Dec would start to bleed from his nose, his mouth, his anus, his ears, every orifice and that we should put a black towel in his cot because it is not pretty and is very traumatic for a parent to watch their child die this way.

The situation is dire and unlike Declan, Reef has the possibility to be saved from this. There are options. He has come so far and to see it end like this, for something as simple as blood, is not acceptable. I am O+ but I am gonna call tomorrow. Maybe there can be compatibility. Please, I am begging the Dec United family to come forward. We always say we wish we could save these little people’s lives. Here is our chance. Please, please, please. When you do the donation, you must say it is for Reef Carneson and the blood will go to Reef. We have held Lydia and Reef’s hand all this way. Reef has beaten so many odds – I beg you, don’t let all Reef’s fight and courage and strength of character come to this ending. Something we can actually do something about. I wish that tomorrow blood services all know Reefs name cos 100’s of people are coming forward, holding his name up and saying we are never gonna let this baby die. But don’t think because I am asking for 100’s that you can say “someone else will do it, so I don’t need to”. Here’s a chance to stand up and be counted. I think to myself, if it was Dec and it came down to this – blood – which we all have and can give away and I couldn’t get it for him, I don’t think I would ever recover having watched my child fight the fight of his life, deal with the chemo, the surgeries, the pain, the side effects to be beaten by blood. I beg you. It would be the best Christmas present you could give this year.

Love me

Friday, December 11, 2009

Hi All

It has been a HECTIC 2 weeks. Our perfume suppliers all close today so we had to make sure we got all our orders in to cover our clients till January. I hope I haven’t made any mistakes cos then there is sweet nothing we can do. Daryl had to head off to Durban to sort some clients out there. I had to get up at 3.45 this morning to take him to the airport. How hideous is that!!! I so don’t do lack of sleep. I tried to palm the trip off on my mother in law but she wasn’t biting. I am so lucky with Daryl because even though he had to work when Dec was sick, he would still do shifts with me at night so that I got some uninterrupted sleep. Daryl can operate on 4 hours but me, I need all 8 otherwise I get tearful and grumpy and mean. I could never be on a program like Amazing Race. Everyone would hate me, because I would be tired and hungry and then get snippity with Daryl cos when I am tired everything is his fault.

He gets back at Sparrow fart on Monday and has to be in Witbank for a couple of days from Tuesday and then lastly Vereeniging and then we done for the year. Did you know that the sun is shining at 5 in the morning? I was horrified, mortified, in shock. Do you know how many people are on the roads at that time already? I even saw some clearly psychotic people cycling and jogging. Since we work 3km’s from our office I rarely raise my little head before the grand old hour of 7 so this morning was quite an eye opener.

We didn’t win the business plan competition. I am sooooooooooo upset. What were they thinking?!?!? I even did that whole splash pool show for them. I went to a meeting on Wednesday where they announced the top 3. There are going to be 10 winners. One in each of the 10 categories and this was just the top 3, so there will still be 7 more announced. However, one of the guys in the top 3 is in MY category, so by necessary implication, he will win MY category. Doesn’t he know its MY category?!?!? I was so hoping to win and end the year off on a good note. It started really badly, 2009, so a good ending would have been so motivating for us.

I must say though, I was telling a friend that 2009 has been both the worst and best year of my life. Worst, for obvious reasons. We lost our son, 7 months, 3 weeks and 4 days into his precious little life, and the best because out of his loss, came so many amazing things. Setting up All Hands On Dec Friends Charity to help other children has been such a fulfilling experience and to know it was done in Declan’s memory and honour is even better. He left a mark, my little boy and changed my life. I had been quite a selfish person before Declan, and just assumed everyone else was, but 2009 showed me that there are some really incredible people out there and I have been overwhelmed by the support, love and encouragement we have received. I can never look at the world through the same eyes again. We are all connected and when the going gets tough, people really are there to hold your hand and see you through it. I have made some amazing new friends, some who I haven’t even met and I know these friendships will be different. They are real and will last my whole life through. Thank you to everyone, who has been with us through this year.

I also want to offer my sincerest condolences to Kim and her family. Kim is one of the kindest people you will ever meet. Nothing is too much for Kim and if you need help, be it to talk on the phone cos you are blue or that you need a stove for a family who doesn’t have one, Kim will find it and Kim will do it. She never ever gives up in her quest to help families of children with cancer and she is a driving force behind collecting funds and items for the charity. She has an 18 month old and a full time job, but ask her to do something or source something and an hour later it’s done. She feels the pain of the world and her compassion is inspiring. I know there are many moms out there with sick children, that she constantly sms’es and calls and visits and supports. Kim lost her brother very suddenly this week. She was on her way to PE yesterday to attend the funeral of Nicholas, her cousin’s child who passed away last week and now she also has to go and bury her brother. Kim, we are all thinking of you and wishing you strength and peace. We love you lots.

I guess a lot of you are off on holiday today as schools close. I wish you all a blessed Christmas and new year and time to rest and enjoy your families and children. We are going to go into hiding. Dec would have been 18 months now and we would have taken him to family in PE this year. He would be running on the sand and playing in the sea, building sand-castles, eating sand-castles, licking ice creams and we would just have had so much fun. Growing up in PE, I would always see the Vaalies at Christmas, walking along the beach in single file, all 15 of them, since the entire extended family would make the annual trek to the coast. They would have umbrellas, cooler boxes, bats and balls, frisbees, skottles, gazebos and they would set up camp for the day no matter what the weather. I couldn’t wait for the day that I would take my child down to the beach, slather them from head to toe in suntan lotion and just play all day like the Vaalies we used to giggle at and this year would have been my first chance. So I am little sad that this is not going to be happening and will rather just have a quiet time at home on Christmas with Daryl and his parents.

Drive safely everyone. There are some drivers like me on the roads so be careful.

Lots of love

Gillian >p> P.S A friend of mines husband was retrenched - at this time of year and is urgently looking for work. He was an operations manager in property development and in the cleaning industry. If you area a personnell agent or an employer with anything for him pls mail me on aurasa@metroweb.co.za so I can forward her the info.

P.P.S Its like the classifieds, my update today - my Polo died and went to Polo heaven, so I am looking for a little hatchback with low mileage. I dont need any bells and whistles - just air-con for the twins. If you are selling your vehicle, please let me know. We have been looking in the paper but what Daryl and I know about cars is scary and we are so scared of buying a dud and I know I can trust you guys. Love me

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